What Do you Know About Obese Anorexia?
What do you know about Obese Anorexia?
I am sure you have heard that your body will store fat if it goes into starvation mode.
I had some biopsies and lumpectomies in the early 90's. Doctors were a bit paranoid, me being a multi generational breast cancer genetic risk. I lost my mother to cancer, (after she fought it for 14 years, ) in 1979.
In the mid 90's, while being part of a research study at UCLA, I found out that all of my DNA "markers" had been knocked out of whack. It was due to many circumstances, including early pregnancy and a hysterectomy at the age of 20. There were other factors as well. It was during the height of the discovery of the Breast Cancer Gene.
In 1991 I was a gym rat already and a performing musician. I was never an obese child and always somewhat of an athlete. During the doctors exploratory procedures, I had gained a few pounds, perhaps 10, and started a long journey of a horrible eating disorder.
I never ate "fast food" despised it actually. I wasn't a binger. I just refused to eat. I gave myself many ailments: IBS, fibromyalgia, diabetes, eventually kidney and liver disease. I became bedridden and unable to care for myself, eventually having only 33% of my short term memory. Of course there is so much more to this story and eventually I will write more about it.
The other day I posted on social media ,"I need to get more trim and cut rather than bulk." A well meaning friend, who is also a trainer, fitness instructor and body builder, said something to the effect of "First watch your caloric intake." The ever favorite- "push away from the table"-mentality.
I knew then, I needed to blog about my eating disorder before I started my fitness/motivational/inspiration blog!!
I have lost nearly 300# from eating. I still do not want to and will find any excuse to avoid it. It is one of the hardest things I have ever had to deal with and society truly endorses the push away from the table mentality.
I have the final stages of cirrhosis of the liver, (with zero hepatitis, now or ever!) and portal hypertension. My liver is so encased in scarring that it can not regenerate--YET, I can not get on a list for a transplant because I am tooooo healthy!
What?
I eat, I must eat. I need to eat something every few hours. I eat proteins, veggies and very little gluten. I like bread, so that slips in. I no longer eat pasta, but I have found great alternatives. I do like ice-cream but other than that, I have removed all processed sugar from my intake. I do not like sugar substitutes either. Honey is my go to. The weight started falling off, the diabetes has been non existent for over 3 years. I am running marathons, triathlons, and this past year became a SPARTAN!
Doctors can not figure it out and I will continue to kick ass!
I take ZERO western medicine. NONE!! (I was on 25+pills a day!) but I do take plenty of herbs and vitamins.
Doctors can not understand my anomaly. I have been a research patient at Stanford for around 3.5 years and hope to be moving everything to Vanderbilt in the next few months. We moved from CA to TN a year ago.
The one thing I can not do is "Push away from the table."
I am writing a book currently which brings up so many "feelings." and old habits creep up. Fears, doubts, self loathing, regret. Those things are the biggest killers, IMO.
As of 2017 I became the last surviving member of 5 siblings. I am the only one left. Trust me when I say, negativity kills.
I am writing this now to at least shed a tiny bit of light on my eating disorder. This past year I was even admitted to an eating disorder clinic here in Chattanooga, TN.
Even after everything I have been through, everything I have learned, I truly know better and I still battle with the need to starve away how I feel.
I am healthier than I have ever been, even with this deadly disease! I quit smoking 21 years ago, quit drinking/drugging 26 years ago. Go to the gym 4-5 times a week. Yet, I can sabotage it by just one meal.
Phil 4:8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.
I am sure you have heard that your body will store fat if it goes into starvation mode.
I had some biopsies and lumpectomies in the early 90's. Doctors were a bit paranoid, me being a multi generational breast cancer genetic risk. I lost my mother to cancer, (after she fought it for 14 years, ) in 1979.
In the mid 90's, while being part of a research study at UCLA, I found out that all of my DNA "markers" had been knocked out of whack. It was due to many circumstances, including early pregnancy and a hysterectomy at the age of 20. There were other factors as well. It was during the height of the discovery of the Breast Cancer Gene.
In 1991 I was a gym rat already and a performing musician. I was never an obese child and always somewhat of an athlete. During the doctors exploratory procedures, I had gained a few pounds, perhaps 10, and started a long journey of a horrible eating disorder.
I never ate "fast food" despised it actually. I wasn't a binger. I just refused to eat. I gave myself many ailments: IBS, fibromyalgia, diabetes, eventually kidney and liver disease. I became bedridden and unable to care for myself, eventually having only 33% of my short term memory. Of course there is so much more to this story and eventually I will write more about it.
The other day I posted on social media ,"I need to get more trim and cut rather than bulk." A well meaning friend, who is also a trainer, fitness instructor and body builder, said something to the effect of "First watch your caloric intake." The ever favorite- "push away from the table"-mentality.
I knew then, I needed to blog about my eating disorder before I started my fitness/motivational/inspiration blog!!
I have lost nearly 300# from eating. I still do not want to and will find any excuse to avoid it. It is one of the hardest things I have ever had to deal with and society truly endorses the push away from the table mentality.
I have the final stages of cirrhosis of the liver, (with zero hepatitis, now or ever!) and portal hypertension. My liver is so encased in scarring that it can not regenerate--YET, I can not get on a list for a transplant because I am tooooo healthy!
What?
I eat, I must eat. I need to eat something every few hours. I eat proteins, veggies and very little gluten. I like bread, so that slips in. I no longer eat pasta, but I have found great alternatives. I do like ice-cream but other than that, I have removed all processed sugar from my intake. I do not like sugar substitutes either. Honey is my go to. The weight started falling off, the diabetes has been non existent for over 3 years. I am running marathons, triathlons, and this past year became a SPARTAN!
Doctors can not figure it out and I will continue to kick ass!
I take ZERO western medicine. NONE!! (I was on 25+pills a day!) but I do take plenty of herbs and vitamins.
Doctors can not understand my anomaly. I have been a research patient at Stanford for around 3.5 years and hope to be moving everything to Vanderbilt in the next few months. We moved from CA to TN a year ago.
The one thing I can not do is "Push away from the table."
I am writing a book currently which brings up so many "feelings." and old habits creep up. Fears, doubts, self loathing, regret. Those things are the biggest killers, IMO.
As of 2017 I became the last surviving member of 5 siblings. I am the only one left. Trust me when I say, negativity kills.
I am writing this now to at least shed a tiny bit of light on my eating disorder. This past year I was even admitted to an eating disorder clinic here in Chattanooga, TN.
Even after everything I have been through, everything I have learned, I truly know better and I still battle with the need to starve away how I feel.
I am healthier than I have ever been, even with this deadly disease! I quit smoking 21 years ago, quit drinking/drugging 26 years ago. Go to the gym 4-5 times a week. Yet, I can sabotage it by just one meal.
Phil 4:8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.
What Happened to Me
Now, heading into my 57th year.
Stretch for NO PAIN
Be Very Careful
Easy Peasy
Dessert : My kind
For the not so detailed updates follow me @ spartan-shell on Instagram
I have made my other IG for family and friends only. shell4art
Thanks! ~shell
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